a Dad’s performance review

This is taken from the Culture Translator email newsletter from axis.org

How Am I Doing?
It’s one of the scariest questions we can ask. Asking ourselves how we’re doing requires vulnerability, honesty, and the willingness to admit failure or that we’re not ok. Asking others how we’re doing means willingly opening ourselves to criticism, which can be painful. So asking our children how we’re doing as parents? Yikes! Yet it’s the only way we can measure our progress or make meaningful improvements. You can’t fix what you don’t know is broken! Sure, your children may want you to make changes that you know aren’t actually good for them, but they also may surprise you with their insight, desires, and dreams. In that vein, pastor and blogger Todd Wagner surveys his kids every six months or year so they have a safe and easy way to provide feedback about how he’s doing as a father. The following are 11 questions he uses as a starting point.

1. What have been some of the best times you’ve had with your dad/mom this past year?
2. If you had to give me some advice on how to be a better dad/mom, what would it be? Why?
3. If you and I could sit down and talk about anything, what would it be?
4. What are some of the things that are making you anxious, fearful, or discouraged right now so I can pray for you?
5. What’s something you would like to do with me?
6. How can I help you grow in your love for God and in your ability to serve and live faithfully for Him?
7. What has been the best thing I’ve done (or that we’ve done together as a family) this last year that has helped you most in your understanding of God and His love for you?
8. What would you say has been the biggest area of growth for you in the last year?
9. What have you learned about God/Christ/faith this last year that has blessed you?
10. If you could grow in any area in the next 12 months, where would you want it to be?
11. What do you think your dad/mom is most passionate about?

Let us know how it goes for you or if you have any great questions you’ve used in the past. We’d love to hear your stories! Todd was also part of our Parenting Teens Summit, and it’s not too late to watch his helpful interview. See “Last Chance” below for more details.